In 1980, or thereabouts, New Scientist held a competition. Readers were asked to submit questions to examine unusual subjects. The prize winners were presented in the March 13, 1980 issue:

University of Creation

Institute of Advanced Theology

Final Year Examination

Paper I: Practical

Candidates must attempt all sections in the order given.

Section 1 Practical Cosmology

In the container No 1 provided, you will find one void. From this you are to create a universe with an inhabitable planet. This planet should have earth, sky, water, night and day as an absolute minimum. Marks will be awarded for originality.

NB Candidates are advised to create a handful of dust for use in section 3.

(Time allowed: 2 days)

Section 2 Applied climatology

Devise a system of zoned climate and weather bands for the planet created in section 1. The weather created should be seasonable, with seasons varying with locality, and should be suitable for the propagation of the vegetation provided in container 2.

(Time allowed: 2 days)

Section 3 Advanced techinques in genetics

Using any raw materials you wish, create a varied collection of wildlife for the planet. There is no limit on variety, but your collection must include aquatic, amphibious, air breathing, and flying creatures which must be able to reproduce their own kind. Other forms may be created provided they are able to thrive and mutliply in the location in which you place them. Marks will be deducted for any imbalance introduced betweeen sections 2 and 3. The handful of dust from section 1 is to be used to created a living being in your own image together with a breeding partner. These will be needed in section 4.

(Time allowed: 1 day)

Section 4 Neuroengineering

The life forms created at the end of section 3 are to be provided with the ability to think and reason, using a heuristic central nervous system. Candidates are warned to take extreme care in this secion, as the slightest error could damage the delicate balance created in sections 2 and 3.

(Time allowed: 1 day)

Candidates will be allowed one day’s grace before Paper II: Theory.

Alan Jones, Dartford New Scientist, 13 March, 1980